


Stay, just..Stay.

by Johnlockthilbo



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Insecurity, M/M, Post Reichenbach
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-17
Updated: 2013-01-17
Packaged: 2017-11-25 19:00:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/641992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Johnlockthilbo/pseuds/Johnlockthilbo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock comes back, John is angry and insecure and Sherlock makes it better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stay, just..Stay.

**Author's Note:**

> SO I know that this has been done a MILLION times before, but I had to try it.

It was an chilly evening, John Watson was sprawled on the sofa, nursing his second beer. He was watching crap telly, some nature program, but not really into it. Today was the first anniversary of Sherlock Holmes' suicide. The papers had several pieces on “that fake genius who offed himself”.

 John hadn't cared, he didn't care. He was a broken shell of a man now, he had moved out of Baker Street by now, the memories too painful. For a few months after “The Day”, he had attempted relationships, but all of the women seemed to sense that there was competition, and none of them lasted more than a few weeks. He barely talked to Mrs. Hudson or Lestrade anymore, their only conversation filler being the topic he wanted most to avoid. Four months after, he was fired from his job, showing up one to many times, hungover from the night before. He didn't need money, his bank account kept being mysteriously filled every month. He drank himself into a stupor most nights trying to forget.

“I'm a fake.”

“Keep your eyes fixed on me. Please will you do this for me?”

“This phone call, it's...it's my note. That's what people do , don't they? Leave a note.”

“Goodbye, John.”

Most nights he would wake up screaming “SHERLOCK!!!”. He stopped going to his therapist, she wasn't helping anyway. Just kept wanting him to say to her what he would have said to Sherlock if given the chance. He was not going to tell her that, when he couldn't even really tell himself.

Taking another swig of his can, John gave a dark chuckle. “Of course, he would die, it's not as if he had anything to stay for. I'm just his idiot blogger.”

Tears slowly trickled down his face, as he thought of Sherlock. “Surely he wouldn't have jumped, if he realized how much he meant to me. I should have told him.”

He sobbed as he remembered his last words to Sherlock's face.”YOU MACHINE”, he had said, angry that Sherlock didn't care about Mrs. Hudson dying. “What I wouldn't give to take back those words.”. Wiping his face and sighing, he stood up and made his way to the stairs. As he was about to step on the first stair, he heard the familiar ping of his mobile on the coffee table, signifying a text. He ignored it and started up the stairs. Another ping. He paused and listened, his phone began to ring loudly. Huffing, he walked back down and picked up his phone. BLOCKED NUMBER his phone read.

He opened it and put it to his ear. “H-hello?” he slurred, cautiously.

“Are you John Watson?” the voice curtly asked. This snapped John out of his haze. That voice sounded familiar!

“Who is this?'', he demanded, glancing about and edging towards his gun.

“Doesn't matter, answer the door” the man's voice said impatiently and ended the call.

At this the door bell rang three times in a row.

John ran towards his gun hidden in the kitchen, put it in his back pocket and tiptoed silently to the front door.

“Who the hell are you?” he bellowed, through the door. The baritone voice that answered “It's me” made John gasp, and fling open the door.

There standing on his front step was his best friend. Soaked from the rain, and dirty from head to toe. His hair was blondish red now but there was no mistaking those eyes and cheekbones.

John floundered “You—you were—I thought you--”

Then, thinking the whiskey had gotten to him, asked politely.  
“May I help you?” His heart thundering on his ribs. “Who is THIS?” he wondered.

“John, it is me.” the man said softly, eyes imploring John.

With that, John punched him in the jaw.

Sherlock gasped and his hand flew to his mouth, and he stumbled to catch himself on the door frame.

“HE IS DEAD!” John cried. “I don't know who the heck YOU are. But he died!!!”

John tried to close the door, but Sherlock was too fast and stuck his foot in before he could.

“John Watson!” He yelled, “You listen to me, right now!” He yanked open the door and stepped in.  
John took a swing and Sherlock ducked it, plowing into John and falling to the floor. He pinned John's swinging hands and just held him down while John was yelling and struggling underneath him.

“GET OFF OF ME, NOW!!!!!”John roared, struggling to push Sherlock off. He was tipsy already and was weakened by many months of not eating properly, so Sherlock easily stayed on.

Then when John exhausted himself and was quiet and just lying there with his eyes clenched shut, Sherlock slowly got off of him.

“John.” Sherlock said softly,”Look at me.”

John stayed on the floor and didn't move.

“JOHN!” Sherlock said louder. John got up without a word and sat on the sofa, despondently staring at the carpet.

Sherlock sighed and went into the kitchen to make some tea, despite this not being Baker Street, it was a relatively similar place. John kept all the stuff in basically the same order. Having located the tea and mugs, he made some tea. He also grabbed a towel and dried himself off. He walked back into the sitting room, and sat next to John's silent form. He sat for a while and then cautiously touched a hand to John's shoulder.

John jerked away and stared at him in shock.

“Don't you dare touch me!” John said vehemently.“You made your best friend mourn you for a whole year! Thinking you were dead, while, what, you were off gallivanting somewhere doing God knows what!!” he ranted.

Pausing, he asked angrily “Sherlock, what were you doing?”

“I was bringing down Moriarty's network.” Sherlock answered calmly.

John deflated at this.”Oh, he had a network?”

Sherlock nodded slowly.

John spits out “So, what, I couldn't come with you?!?!” He cried. “I could have helped, Sherlock! Surely you needed some help while you were out there!” He got up and starting pacing. “Or you could have left a hint, couldn't you have?” He stopped and stared at Sherlock.

“I thought we were best friends, Sherlock! Surely you would have known what this would do to me. I thought that you cared for me.” he said brokenly. Sherlock tried to interject and John holds up a hand to silence him. “I thought I meant something to you, but I guess I WAS just a blogger to you. For a whole YEAR, I mourned you! I almost killed myself twice, in my grief. This was all a game to you, wasn't it?!?” John wept.

“NO!” Sherlock cried passionately, “You don't understand, John. I did all of this to protect you!” He jumped up and grabbed John by the shoulders “So, that you would live! You, Mrs. Hudson, and Lestrade all had snipers trained on you, and the only way that I could save you was that they had to believe that I was dead. That was the only way they could be called off! I traveled to America, Russia, all over Europe to take down the rest of Moriarty's web so that I could come home to you.”

He paused, breathless. “I couldn't risk letting you come with me or even giving you a hint, because they would have killed you if they knew I was still alive”.

He looked into John's eyes. ''You are my best friend, John, first and foremost. You are absolutely invaluable in every way to me, never forget that.”.

John sniffled “Invaluable?”

Sherlock huffed a laugh “Yes, John, I couldn't do the work without you!” Sherlock was suddenly engulfed by John's arms in a hug. He relaxed and wrapped his long arms around John's middle. John buried his face in Sherlock's shoulder.

“Am I forgiven, then?” Sherlock asked gently.  
John lifted his face and grinned shyly. “Of course, you are, you dolt”. Then realizing how they were standing, grew embarrassed and started to pull away.

Sherlock refused to unlock his arms, and pulled him tighter.”John, there has been something I have wanted to talk to you about for a long time.” He said quietly.

“When I was away, I had a lot of time to think. I would forget myself and start talking to you, as if you were there. I thought about you every day. One day about 6 months ago, I came back to London, chasing a suspect. I caught him but I needed to see you. So I went to my grave and you were there, crying and yelling at me to come back and that's when I realized.”

“Realized what?” John asked, puzzled. They were still embracing and it was making John's brain short circuit being this close to Sherlock.

“That I—well I realized—how I--” Sherlock stuttered.

“Sherlock, what?” John prompted. “Sherlock's stuttering?!?!” he thought.

“I love you!” Sherlock said abrubtly, causing John to stiffen. ”I always have, I think I started to right when you gave me your mobile to borrow, I just never realized it! I love that you make me tea, I love your fuzzy jumpers, I love that you type with two fingers!, I love that you call me amazing when everyone else calls me a freak. I love that you can heal and kill with the same hands! You are the best friend that I've ever had and I absolutely cannot lose you.”

John gaped at him in wonder and amazement. “You l-love Me?” he whispered.

“You, only you” Sherlock murmured, leaning forward to meet John's face.”I love you.”

John leaned back, away from Sherlock ”How could you love me? I'm just a broken, ex soldier, I'm a drunk now, just like my sister, I lost my job, so I'm not even a doctor anymore. I've lost weight. I can't do anything! I'm nothing, Sherlock, nothing!”

He pulled out of Sherlock's arms completely and turned his back on him. "You only love a ghost of me, the man I used to be." Sherlock stepped forward quickly, spun John around and crushed his lips to John's. John froze in shock. Breaking it off, Sherlock said fiercely. “You are everything!” He kissed John again. He looked into his eyes intensely. 

“You are all I need, You complete me in every possible way. I need you like I need oxygen. This past year had been the worse thing to ever go through, for me. I missed you so much. We won't need to have your job, we'll start back on cases and earn money that way. You are so beautiful to me, I'll feed you right, and you'll gain your lovely muscles back in no time, John.” he teased. 

John laughed at this and his face softened as he listened to Sherlock. "I'm not gonna pretend I understand you, Sherlock but I am grateful." he sighed. "I don't care if you don't understand, you just better believe it." Sherlock grumbled, pressing himself closer to John. “I really don't deserve you.” John shook his head. He wound his arms around Sherlock's neck to bring his face down.

“I am the one who doesn't deserve YOU.” Sherlock disagreed. Their lips met in a sweet kiss.

Sherlock muttered against John's lips “I love you, you know? You're my life.”

John sighed happily ''Thank you, Sherlock.” He caressed those cheekbones “I love you, too.” he said finally. He brought his lips to Sherlock's again, and gave him a searingly deep kiss. His hands buried in Sherlock's light short locks. At the feel of it, he broke off the kiss, looked at the hair and giggled.

“I guess I'll have to get used to this.” he said, running his hand over Sherlock's head.

Sherlock gave a deep chuckle and replied “No, goodness no, This terrible hair will be fixed as soon as possible.” They both grinned

“It was only for a disguise,” Sherlock added.

This sobered John up and he gripped Sherlock harder. He said softly, “Promise me, you'll never leave me again, I couldn't bare it a second time. Especially not now.”

Sherlock touched his lips to John's forehead “I will never leave you again, If I need to go away, you are coming with me.” he assured him. “I will not be parted from you again.” he kissed John gently.

They lost themselves in each other lips for awhile and then parted when they needed to breathe.

“We should get some sleep,” John said, ”It's late.” He pulled away from Sherlock's arms.

“I'll sleep on the sofa, then.” Sherlock offered, walking over there.

“NO!” John cried, and then more softly, “Please stay with me? In my room?''

Sherlock nodded, relieved. “Yes, of course, I would love to” He followed after John to his bedroom.

They changed quickly and laid down side by side. There was silence for a few minutes and then:

“Thank you for giving me my miracle, Sherlock” John whispered. ''I love you”. He leaned over and gave him a quick kiss. Sherlock grabbed him to hold him in place and deepened the kiss.

The kiss ended and breathless, Sherlock answered, “I love you, too. Always have, always will.”

 

THE END

**Author's Note:**

> SO there. My very first Fanfic ever! and no one will prob read it..OH WELL!! sorry about the format, I couldn't get it to work :((


End file.
